Arguing is not discussing. Arguing is having a 'reactive or thoughtless' conversation for the purposes of making yourself right at the expense of making the other person wrong. More than that, you argue because another person's point of view made you feel, in some way, insecure about your own point of view. If you were truly secure in what you believed, you would never have a reason to argue with another.
The way to end arguing with others is to understand that there point of view (on any subject) that contradicts your point of you is their truth.
Keep in mind another person's truth is just as valid to them as your truth is valid to you. That being the case you might then ask, who is right and who is wrong? Based on what each of them knew at the time, they are both right. More importantly when we invalidate another person's truth we are showing great disrespect towards them and when people feel disrespected (and not heard by us) their upset escalates.
A continuation of not respecting or not hearing a another person's truth never ends up taking us to any place good.
When people say to me THAT'S NOT TRUE in response to something I said to them, this is my response back to them.
I understand what I said is not true for you. That being said, based on my own life experience, it is true for me.
The ability to 'agree to disagree' without offending another person takes practice but it is so worth it if you want to keep that person in your life. On the other hand, if there is someone that you don't want to keep in your life, argue with them frequently and guaranteed they will do you the favor of leaving your life rather quickly. 🌝
Frederick Zappone
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