Loving the UNLOVABLE parts of you.

To heal ourselves, to feel whole again. To feel energetic and alive, it is important that we become aware of and then love those parts of ourselves that we have rejected as not acceptable to us.

Any part of ourselves (physically, mentally, emotionally) that we do not like will be healed once we love our unlovable parts without judgment.

What parts of your physical body have you not been loving? 

What emotions or thoughts have you not been loving?

Nothing is healed by hating or disliking anything about yourself.

Once you infuse what you don't like about yourself with love, healing takes place naturally.

Question: How do I love the unlovable parts of me.

Answer: By doing the exact opposite of what you been doing when you have been hating or disliking something about yourself. 

The beginning of loving an unlovable part of ourselves is acceptance of that part. Without acceptance love is not possible. 

After acceptance 'observe the judgments' you have about that part of you and then release those judgments. You release judgments when you realize how awful they make you feel and how much energy and power they take from you.

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Excerpted From the Book
FUN, PLAY, LIVING LIFE MY WAY
(If it ain't Easy, it ain't working for me)
Copyright 2019 By Frederick Zappone
My previously published books can be previewed here
https://www.amazon.com/Frederick-Zappone/e/B00BMJR998/  

You Are More POWERFUL Than You Know. (Article)

1. Thoughts are what you want to believe.  

2. Feelings tells you what you actually believe. 

3. Feelings are what makes your beliefs real to you.

To change what you really believe you must through repetition repeat your new belief (thought), often enough, until it becomes anchored in your subconscious mind. Once that happens, your word will become LAW in your universe and will manifest itself into your physical reality.

Nothing in your life will substantially change until you change your beliefs. The most crippling belief you currently have is not loving all of yourself. Anything less than total acceptance of yourself exactly the way you are destroys your ability to be the magnificent, powerful, lovable to the core person you are destined to be.

Rejection of any part of yourself is what causes you unnecessary stress, tension, worry, self-doubt and needlessly suffering. 

When you love yourself sufficiently you will be able to live in peace and harmony with both your strengths and weaknesses and feel totally confident in fully expressing yourself rather than continuing to go through life holding yourself back or depressing yourself in any way. 

Until you love yourself sufficiently (which gives you the ability to fully accept yourself as you are) you will never possess the strength and power to create your life exactly the way you want it to be.

Are You TOO HARD On Yourself?

There is nothing worse that being highly critical of ourselves for not being the perfect person we want to be. Being critical of ourselves does not make us a better person, it makes us a far worse person.

Often times we are trying to reach standards of success or perfection that we never set for ourselves in the first place. 

The standards of success we pursue that cause us to reject ourselves when we fail were set by other people during our growing up years. 

Those standards could have been set by our parents, teachers, relatives or our local minister. Regardless, trying to be perfect or achieve levels of success that other people wish to see us achieve has caused many a good person to suffer needlessly. 

Giving yourself the gift of unconditional self-love is the greatest gift you can possibly give yourself.  Giving yourself this gift takes both time and practice but it is worth it to be able to live in peace and harmony with both the good and not so good sides of yourself.

On the Internet the success you see other people achieving is presented to you by folks who only bring their 'A' game to the Internet. Behind the scenes of their lives they have the same problems and personal conflicts that you have with yourself, something you rarely see.  

You may admire the lifestyle of the Kardashians but I guarantee you they have more problems and conflicts than you will ever have. And worse yet, because they are in the public eye all the time, they always have to be at their best which only creates constant unwanted stress.

Learning to accept your weaknesses and imperfections is perfection. When you can live in peace and harmony with both the saint and sinner sides of you, you're as close to perfection in this life as you will ever get.

By the way, you don't have to like your weaknesses or imperfections to accept them, you only have to accept them to experience more love and appreciation of yourself.  

In the final analysis, it doesn't matter if you are successful or perfect in the eyes of others, it only matters that you love yourself unconditionally.

 

The Easiest Way To Change People. (In fact, the only way)

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You can try to change people, for the better, by threat or fear but in the end that kind of change is short lived. As soon as the threat or fear is no longer in a person's life, they will revert back to their old habits. If you want to see people change for the better, permanently, accept them exactly the way they are. 

When people feel accepted exactly the way they are,  they feel this tremendous love and appreciation for the 'gift of acceptance' you gave them and it makes them want to improve naturally. Genuine acceptance of another, exactly the way they are, empowers them to get unstuck from the things they do not like about themselves and allows them to develop those traits that makes them feel good about themselves.

How do I know this to be true? Because I was on the receiving end of both  'acceptance and no acceptance' regarding the way I was. When I wasn't accepted, I got worse. However, once someone showed up in my life who accepted me exactly the way I was, I got better naturally - Frederick Zappone

Self-Forgiveness Sets Me Free From The Mistakes I Make

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I don't know about you but I can be very hard on myself. You see I have high standards for myself, ridiculously high. I am not sure when I got my standards (performance expectations) or from whom but my self-imposed standards of excellence have caused me to suffer needlessly from time to time... And since I don't like suffering, I discovered forgiving myself for not meeting my high standards releases me from any penalty or punishment (real or imagined) when I don't reach them.. 

Forgive means to: 1. grant pardon for an offense ; to absolve; to set free from punishment. 2. to cease to feel resentment against yourself or others. When I forgive myself I am set free to create what I want rather than being filled with feelings of  guilt, resentment, anger,  anxiety, fear or depression. The unwillingness to forgive myself for my mistakes makes 'nasty feelings' stick to me like SUPER GLUE.  And since I don't like feeling negative, forgiving myself for not meeting my own high standards makes me feel great.

If you have ridiculously high standards for yourself, like I do, then you know that no matter what you do, your best is never good enough... And since that is true for me, I forgive myself for not measuring up. I forgive myself for not being as good as other folks. I forgive myself that my best isn't good enough for other people and in forgiving myself, I accept my best is good enough. it's good enough for me..

Breaking the HABIT of Judging and Criticizing Yourself.

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The More Love You Give, The More Love You Receive

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The more love you give, the more love you receive. To receive love, you first must give it. To give it, you first must love yourself because without loving yourself, you will have no love to give to others.  I use to hate myself and so I had to teach myself  how to love me. Once I did that, I felt so much love inside of myself that I felt if I didn't give it away I would burst. I then discovered the more love I gave away, the more love that was returned to me.  This video is a perfect example. The song on it was sung and recorded especially for me in exchange for the love and support I've given a new friend of mine that I met online. Her voice melts my heart because I can feel the love she is giving back to me. In return, after hearing her song, I added pictures to it and turned her mp3 file into video as my gift of love multiplied back to her... She is my friend and she demonstrates the kind of warm, passionate caring love friends can share with one another without turning the love we feel for one other into something it is not. We are true friends and that benefits each of us enough.  - Frederick Zappone, author of The More I Give, The More I Receive

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GIVING LOVE AWAY

If you feel love for someone and don't share it with them it is like wrapping a gift for someone you love and then not giving it to them. That's why when I feel love, I always express it to those I love. As an example, here is a  valentine card I sent to all the women I love.

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Freeing Yourself From FAILURE

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As soon as you accept that you have failed, you are free to succeed. Non-acceptance of your failure keeps you feeling like a failure long after the actually failure has taken place. http://frederickzappone.com/

 


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Accepting the Unacceptable

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If I accept the 'resistant/persistent' thought that I will never have what I want, the moment I accept it, what I want shows up in my life unexpectedly. http://ping.fm/k8ERV
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Have you been rejected?

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Rejection is God's protection - Author Unknown
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Moment

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Resistance or non-acceptance of an unpleasant event that happened to you in the 'present moment' robs you of your power and puts your mind into a negative tail spin. On the other hand, acceptance of what happened to you renews your energy and give you the power to move beyond it so you can create something GREAT for yourself.
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Self-Love

http://encwor.blogspot.com/2010/06/love_26.html.

In life, we either accept ourselves exactly as we are or we find fault with ourselves.  Accepting yourself exactly as you are frees you up to become the person you want to be while finding fault with yourself keeps love from finding a home in your heart.

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Choice

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Accepting 'what is' frees you up to create what will be. In other words, 
you have to choose what you have in order to get what you want.

Paradox

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It is  not what I want,  it is what I have and until I accept what I have, I can't have what I want. Choosing what I have sets me free to have what wasn't possible to have before.

Acceptance

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Acceptance of 'what is' frees you up to create what will be.

Suffering

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The way out of suffering is through it. Resist suffering
and suffering increases. Acceptance, in the moment, that
you are suffering will dissolve your suffering instantly.