What I did to 'Unscrew' Myself

Like so many of us I started off my life being very happy but as I grew older I became unhappy. I became unhappy because I started believing the lies people were telling me about myself.  

Worse yet, there were so many different people telling me so many different and conflicting lies about myself that by the time I reached twenty-one I was so screwed up that it took the next thirty years of my life to get my head screwed back on straight..

The truth be told, for the longest time I was the most insecure, shy,  person you could ever possibly know. Fortunately I was able to turn my greatest weaknesses into my greatest strengths.
  
My SECRET for turning my weaknesses into strengths has been to accept and love myself exactly as I am, one moment at a time..  We all have a private side and a public side. The private side is usually the abused side of us that we hide from view from other people out of shame and guilt. None of us escaped our childhood without being abused in some way (mentally, emotionally or physically) by someone. 

You Teach Best What You Most Need To Learn - Rich Bach

I'll be your didn't know this but the people who have been abused the most, often times, become psychiatrists, psychologists. counselors or self-help teachers like myself. This allows us to help others and at the same time safely work out our own issues of shame and guilt without being a problem to society or others.  

Self-love has been the most important 'healing agent' in successfully dealing with my insecure self image. It has allowed me to accept myself at my worst and absolutely adore myself at my best. Without self-love, I would have continued to unconsciously abuse myself by thoughtlessly criticizing myself when things weren't going my way. 

Today I take full responsibility for everything that happens to me. I no longer blame anyone for anything. When I occasionally catch myself wanting to blame someone for my pain, I remind myself that blame is the way I allow all of my personal power to bleed out of me. 

By taking full responsibility for everything that happens to me my authentic power is fully restored to me and I am free to become as magnificent and as powerful as I want to be.
 

Unhappy? Dissatisfied? Don't Know What To Do About It?

Comment: I am unhappy and I am not sure what to do about it?

Answer: Don't do anything about it. Don't judge yourself for being unhappy and don't try to run away from it. Just be with it. 

Chances are you are unhappy because you have been so busy pursuing something you thought would make happy but in reality the 'pursuit of it' has made you more unhappy than you were before you started.

Many people use their unhappiness to motivate themselves to become happy.  If you are unhappy, using your unhappiness to help you achieve something you think will make you happy will only make you unhappier. 

Instead of being unhappy about being unhappy or resisting your unhappiness which will only make you more unhappy, be with it. 

STOP,  BREATHE and be with your unhappiness. 

If you do that, you will notice your unhappiness is either a result of you doing something you really don't want to do OR it is because you are pursuing something that is just not yours to have.

To be happy, you first have to OBSERVE or notice what you are doing that is making you unhappy and then do the opposite of it.  That's the simplest and most effective solution to your unhappiness. Notice what is making you unhappy and then do the opposite of it. For example.

If waiting for something is making you unhappy, don't wait.
If wanting something is making you unhappy then don't want.
If doing nothing is making you unhappy, do something.
If you judge yourself harshly, allow those judgments to pass you by.
If thinking too much is making you unhappy, think less.

You get the idea, stop and think what is making you unhappy and then do the opposite of it and your happiness will be restored to you.

AUTHOR NOTE: I know this is a stupid article, at least my 'super critical mind' judges it to be that way but that's all I got this morning.  

I am not going to make myself unhappy because I don't have a better piece of writing to give you or because my super critical mind has just judged what I sharing with you as something stupid. 

My happiness is dependent on me loving and accepting myself, exactly as I am, moment by moment, rather than making myself wrong for how I am thinking and feeling in any given moment of time.. That's why when my mind is being super critical of what I am doing, I don't make myself wrong for my mind judging me, I simply accept it and allow the unwanted judgment to harmlessly pass me by, like clouds in the sky, and it does.

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Unconditionally Loving The IMPERFECT You

Mike Cortson Happiness Quotation

Question: Why am I afraid to be happy? (Article)

Answer: You are not the first person who asked me that question and I doubt you will be the last. If you got into the habit, during your growing up years, of surviving by being unhappy,  the thought of being happy threatens your survival. It doesn't threaten it on the physical level but it does on the emotional and psychological levels.

Another way of saying this is if your parents were unhappy people, and they were your role models, chances are you will be unhappy too.  For people who have not experienced genuine happiness, as an adult, happiness can feel like something outside their comfort zone.

The normal way to be is to feel happy most of the time but most people aren't normal. I would suggest trying being happy for 30 minutes a day and see how that works out for you.  

Happiness is your natural state. There is nothing you have to do or have to be happy, you just have to allow yourself to be happy and you will. 

Many people are afraid to be happy because they blame happiness as the reason they get hurt unexpectedly or as the reason something bad happens in their lives when they least expect it.

The fact is bad things happen in the world whether you are happy or not so you might as well be happy.  For some people being unhappy is the way they protect themselves from being hurt worse.  Their logic for protecting themselves by being unhappy goes something like this:

 'If I am unhappy and someone hurts me or something bad happens unexpectedly, it won't feel as bad as it would if I was happy and someone hurts me or something bad happened.' 

Being unhappy is a vicious circle because being unhappy naturally attracts more unhappiness to you. The fact is, you are  used to being unhappy just as some people are used to smoking cigarettes.  

You give up unhappiness the same way you give up cigarettes, you just stop.  It takes practice to stop one habit of thought and replace it with another. As I suggested earlier, practice being happy for 30 minutes at a time and see how that works out for you.

If you have any questions about your happiness issue, leave a comment and I will respond to it as soon as I can. - Frederick Zappone

Thoughts that Make me Happy....

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Thoughts that are true for you will make you happy, all other thoughts will not.... 
that's how you know which thoughts are the 'right' thoughts for you. - FrederickZappone.Com

The 4 Rules of Being Happy NOW...

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Being Happy - Rule 1  
Being Happy - Rule 2  
Being Happy - Rule 3  
Being Happy - Rule 4

Project Forgive, A Community of HAPPY People, Click Here

Happy Monday!

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It's 12:30 AM, Monday Morning, and I am awash in happy feelings. I am happy because I have been repeating the 'One Magnificent Thought'. The 'One Magnificent Thought' is causing waves of happiness to wash over me like warm ocean waves on a hot summer day. When I repeat the  'One Magnificent Thought' on a regular basis, it attracts good things to me includes feelings of happiness.  I must admit, it feels good to experience feelings of happiness coursing through my veins out of thin air, unexpectedly, as a result of one magical thought. 

Happy Music For a Happy Day

Happiness - Your Natural State

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‘Wanting’ to be happy is enough to lead you to the experience of happiness without needing anything outside yourself to experience it. You don’t need money, the perfect relationship or great sex to experience happiness now. You just need ‘to want’ to be happy now and you will either be guided to the happiness you seek or it will find its way home to you. (And in the process your circumstances will change too, for the better)

The reason most people have such difficulty living a happy and contented life, right now, is that they have cultivated a  ‘Discontented Mind.’  A discontented mind is one that complicates everything rather than seeing the beauty and simplicity in all things. Simple thinking leads to peace of mind and clarity of thought while complicated thinking leads to conflict, pain and confusion.

Related Reading:  The 'One Magnificent Thought' 
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